You have been talking about a number of different display areas and organizations: the categories sidebox, the category index page and possibly the product listing.
Which do you really want to use? You say you want the existing category organization (topic cat > male/female subcats) to stay as is. That means the category index stays the same.
You say you want the categories sidebox to be organized differently. That could be done by adding a new loop around the main loop to cycle through the categories twice, once selecting and outputting male subcat names and again selecting and outputting female subcat names to display in the sidebox. A question you may not have considered: how are all of these "Male" subcats going to be identified as to topic? If the subcat name is "Male" in each case, you need to do something to avoid confusion. Replacing the subcat names (using Categories Dressing features) with images unique to each subcat having relevant text in the image might work. Renaming the "Male" subcats to "Male Shirts" etc. might also work.
Your latest post talks about reorganizing the category index page. Are you not going to display the categories as the original organization shows?



